On edge is great way to describe me right now. In less than ten days the trial for our two foster babies begins. And I am starting to freak out.
My poor husband.
(Plus he keeps "forgetting" we're having a baby, that's not helping his cause:)
I think the most unsettling thing about this part of these babies story is that this is it, this is the big turning point (thus far) in their story. And no matter which way it goes, it will be hard.
I am sitting outside the department right now, waiting to get them from one of their possible last visits with their mom and dad. And as I look around at the other foster mom's waiting in their cars I can't help but wonder, "What IS best?"
I will try and rest in God's peace, and understand that He loves them more than I ever could. And trust that He will bring about the best for them. But I also know that we live in a fallen world and these babies have a lot ahead of them. I hope we're a part of the struggles and victories that lie ahead for them. But now, I just have to CHILL out, let GO, and try to fill my days with ANYTHING that might distract me!
On another note, Demetrius always talks about his friends at school, but the friend he talks about most often is a little girl named Abby, a gorgeous little blonde girl. What do they have in common?
Well, the other day I went to speak at a gathering for potential foster parents and Abby's mom came up and introduced herself. Turns out Abby was adopted through the foster care system in another state. And I can't help but wonder, is that why they're friends? Do they know they have more in common than any of the other twenty kids running around each day? Is it unspoken? Do they meet each others need for security? They play a game of rescuing each other from sharks EVERY day on the playground. And D is obsessed with making sure the doors are closed in the classroom, and having the teachers tell him whats next on the schedule. So do they feel safe together? I am probably over thinking things, but I do wonder.
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